Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Stung by the stinging fly !

My masterpiece! How could they? Reject it? Has Declan Meade lost his senses? No, (whispering low) truth be told when I said it was the greatest story ever written, i was exaggerating a little. It is in fact,how can I put it? Mmmm, Yes, shite - but don't tell anyone. Like the six million dollar man my epic tale of woe and joy and more woe can be rebuilt, clearly there wasn't half enough (human) sex in it, precious little space travel, only one alien , too many monkeys and most of the words were the right ones but they were in the wrong order.In short it's nothing that can't be sorted out over a cup of tea and a bourbon and a tab of acid. So if there are any other publications out there that take shorties they better brace themselves for 'The greatest story ever told in a short story, the remake' Due out when I can be arsed.

17 comments:

Unknown said...

Ah well, TFE, they didn't think much of my poems either ;) You're in good company :)

Kat Mortensen said...

Clearly, anyone who doesn't recognize the sheer genius of a good monkey story is not worth their salt. (*shaking head*).

Come on over the BFtP for a little 70s shindig and a few bevvies to soothe the savage breast.

Kat

Emerging Writer said...

you can never have too many monkey but you can have too many words. Hard Luck

Heather said...

Don't lose heart TF - keep trying! Some people don't know a good thing when they see it.

Unknown said...

Hang in there TFE-- the thing to remember about publishing the old fashioned way-- it doesn't necessarily mean about your work when they reject & it doesn't necessarily mean much when they accept it either. But from what I've read here I know you're a good writer, & I wish you best of luck!

Totalfeckineejit said...

The best of company, B, in fact I'm the the boogie woogie bugle boy of company,B. Haven't had my fly poetry rejecto yet,I'm still in the deluded optimist section of that particular asylum. :)

Totalfeckineejit said...

Ah Kat, the only trouble with Monkeys is that the higher they go up the tree the more they show their arse.( I wish I could remember where I read that) See you over at BFtP :)

Totalfeckineejit said...

Thanks EW.Some people say you make your own luck in this world, but I wasted six months in the shed at the bottom of the garden trying with corduroy,milk bottle tops and baling twine.

Totalfeckineejit said...

Thanks Heather, I will keep trying,Mrs EEjit says I'm very trying.

Totalfeckineejit said...

Thanks John,that's a good point there , some pragmatic perspective,( I get the feeling you've been there, done that and got the Tshirt) and thanks too for the encouragement. But John,honestly, I'm really not a good writer- I'm a feckin great one ;)

Padhraig Nolan said...

Commiserations TFE. Remember, each rejection is just a step towards the next success. Keep on keeping on!

Totalfeckineejit said...

You're right PJ ,rejection is the cornerstone, just gotta keep building ,jus gotta keep doin the do!

Group 8 said...

Hard Luck, TFE. If it's any consolation, they only take a teeny handful of stories in every year and they get HUNDREDS of subs. Send it someplace else.
I haven't heard yet. Good sign? Bad sign?
I'm trying Revival again with poems (31st May deadline). Let's see if the buggers ignore me completely twice in a row!!

Mad Aunt Bernard said...

Don't lose heart, I agree with P Nolan. You're just one step nearer a success, and it'll be all the more sweet when it arrives.

In the meantime, for the rejectors of genius...May weevils infest their flour bags, may they be eternally confused by hard sums and may my Aunt Vom attack them with satsumas.

Blessings of oddness and success upon you and yours. x

Totalfeckineejit said...

Hey WRW, I've already sent it somewhere else -the bin!Is not hearing yet a good sign? Let's hope so -haven't heard about me poems yet that I sent flywards on 15th Jan.It couldn't possibly be could it? Good luck with Revivo I'm sure they'll get back to you (with an accepto too) this time.I'll be sending them a few meself as well.

Totalfeckineejit said...

Thanks MAB, hope Aunt V has plenty o satsumas,I'm expecting plenty of rejectos this year.The fly were right to reject my story,I buy the mag and expect the standard to be the highest, but some others do get it wrong I'm certain and to add to your excellent curses for them , I hope that their ears fall off at a very inconvenient moment.

Unknown said...

Hi TFE:

You've got an award over at my humble abode.