Saturday, October 30, 2010

You know how to drive a bus doncha?


Just put your lips together and blow. Or is that whistling?

Either which way drivers are required.No previous experience, talent, or ability necessary, as can be seen from the previous drivers...(Ok,I'm joking, I'm joking, calm down!)

Next available driverless dates,in order of appearance, are... Nov 8th and Nov 15th followed by Nov 29th, Dec 6th, Dec 13th.

Ask not what these dates can do for you, but what you can do for these dates.Now is the time comrades to rise from the ranks, to proudly stick your nose above the steering wheel of life and show the world what you can do, to bravely take charge and steer a bus full of burgeoning and blustering creativity and mould it to the shape of your imagination ,then send it off round the highways and byways of the globe like a chariot of fire.

Think of the power, the adrenalin rush, the satisfaction in knowing that when the bus's hour of need came you were there at the bus stop with your wit, your wisdom, and your sandwiches.That you stood tall , climbed aboard, taking care not bang your head on the conductors pole, and with pride thumping in your chest like a rabbit in a shoebox,you magnificently and single handedly lead the people of the bus out, out, OUT! of the creative darkness and into the all embracing bright-lit dawn of POETRY!

Then in years to come when your golden child or grandchild looks flutteringly up into your kindly old face and asks ' 'Mummsie/Pater/Nanny/ Grandpa, what did you do in the poetry war?'
You can lift your wrinkly old chin up high and proudly say... 'Who the fuck are you?'

Well that's what my grandparents used to say to me anytime I asked them anything.

And from Dec 20th through to 27th I'll be driving a (un)spectacular reindeer powered CHRISTMAS Holiday SPECIAL bus on ice, with mince pies,pints of Baileys, and (temporarily) live dancing (well, running)Turkeys! Don't miss it! Ho! ho! ho! oh, no! no! no! Not yet!

Play it again Sam!!

You must now drive the bus
a place for each one of us
on it you can rely

The world will always welcome Bus Poets
as it drives by.

9 comments:

Raph G. Neckmann said...

Well, I know how to drive our tours bus, but not a poetry one! And I drove our submarine a few times too ...

It's good to be back on dry land, and visiting bloggyland again, and all you lovely human bloggy friends, TFE!

The Bug said...

I'll take any (one!) of the dates except the first one - I need time to come up with a cunning plan.

MuseSwings said...

I've not driven a bus before - do not have the license or skill But that won't stop me from jumping on Move over, driver, I will!

What ever date you schedule me is fine.

Unknown said...

I can take Nov 8th? *frantically tries to think of an idea*

Heather said...

Glad the offers of drivers are beginning to come in, but don't let any of them get a whiff of the stuff in that bottle or we'll all be in the ditch.

Kat Mortensen said...

I'll take December 6th(it's not a Friday, is it? No, it wouldn't be because it's the PB, so it would be a Monday,right?)

I have something up my sleeve, but need a bit of time to get prepared for my own post for this.

Unless we sell our house and that's a really bad day. In that case I may need to switch with someone.

Kat

The Weaver of Grass said...

Fit me in wherever there is a gap but let me know in good time so that I can think of something deadly. Oh - and remember that I don't do links. (don't do darning, turning shirt collars or putting sheets side to middle either but that#s another story).
And with a word-verification like FRIBLEAD who knows what gem of poetry titles might emerge from the fog of my brain.

Karen said...

I'll take the 15th if it's not taken already!

Titus said...

I have nothing up my sleeve and whilst I have driven at ludricrous speeds in high-powered vehicles and steered my share of 7-tonners, I have, to my shame, never driven the bus because I am much too busy and can't do those fancy links like everybody else does.
That aside, put me down for Dec 13th as guilt is a fearful motivator. I have sucked enough: now it is time to suckle. Or something.