Saturday, June 6, 2009

TFE's BAD GOOD BEER GUIDE


Hello comrades and welcome to more helpful hints from the worlds biggest EEjit. My new beer guide will be an irregular unthorough and shallow sampling of all the worlds greatest beers, so if you have any you'd like to send me to be reviewed(I'm particularly looking for breweries and large quantities here) then please feel free to do so.My views are non partisan and totally independent unless of course you want a guaranteed good review in which case send me a barrel of beer and /or plenty of money. All beers will be graded using my patented Shane MacGowan scale or Mac's out of ten as I call it,one Mac being the lowest and 10 Mac's being the highest. I kick off with a Scottish beer (From Edinburgh) that I have never tasted before.My previous experience of scottish beers is limited to luke warm cans of midget-sized McKewans priced at their weight in gold on British Rail trains in the 80's and tasting like pish as they say in Burns country. This particular beer however is Innis and Gunn oak aged beer which according to the blur,I mean the blurb, on the back is matured in oak barrells for thirty days then emptied and allowed to mature for a further 47 days resulting in a delicious refreshing beer with aromas of vanilla and toffee( Is this a beer or some class o fancy-dan vino I'm wundrin?) a hint of citrus, and a malty, lightly oaked finish. In reality it tasted like whiskey and pepper to me , very dizappointing. At 6.6 vol alcohol it is high in the getting pissed stakes but low on value at €2.20 per 330ml. I give this beer 3 Mac's out of 10.

7 comments:

Kat Mortensen said...

Ha ha! I LOVE IT! (Lovely pics of the always gorgeous exemplary-toothed McGowan.)
I've enjoyed a few McEwan's in my day (not on Brit Rail) but in a proper pint glass over a bar rail.

Will you be taste-testing the foreigners or only your domestics, like? I'd love to hear what you think of Belgium's Hoegaarden (that's my personal favourite, next to Tuborg).

Skol! Slainte! and Bottoms up!

Kat

Dr. Jeanne Iris said...

TFE, here in the States, I tried Dundee's Honey Beer a little while ago, and found it delightful. You might try MacTarnahan's Honey Beer over yonder in your neck of the woods. It might be what keeps the bees buzzing! Happy sipping! :-)

licadest: an adjective that describes a highly pleasurable ice cream experience.

Heather said...

I thought you couldn't beat a good pint of Guinness. My Irish oeseopath assures me it isn't alcohol, it's food!!

Totalfeckineejit said...

Yes! Kat, yes!I will test them ,send them over-as many as you like and there must be some lovely canadian beers etc.

And you too, Jeanne ,send 'em over -never heard of any of dem but if they're all made of honey maybe that's why the bees fly so funny.

You're right heather Guinness is good for you,that's what I keep telling myself the next day when I can't bend over without temporary dizzying blindness.

Kat Mortensen said...

I'll send over a few Moosehead from my mother's homeland, Nova Scotia, but you'll want to try the finest beer known to these parts, "Lucky". (cheapest too--I could send over a boatload and you wouldn't be out-of-pocket, as they say). Of course you'll have to change your title to Good BAD Beer Guide for that one.
And then there's the cat's-piss of "Old Milwaukee".

Kat

Mad Aunt Bernard said...

Aha! I think the McGowan photos represent a new branch of my family. As for the beer - I like a pint of Guinness....and another, and another, and so on. The more you sample it, the more I find I can sing, and my banjo playing improves, and the more I laugh at my own jokes. I put it on Folly's bowl of ricicles when she's staying, it calms her down nicely. On a serious note, Cobra is moreish, as is another beer Mr Aunt Bernard and I have. It's polish, there are s t z and s again but I couldn't tell you what it's called. Glad to be so informative! Happy inebriation....

Totalfeckineejit said...

You're sending me mooseheads , it's not gonna be like a scene out of The Godfather is it? I think, Kat, you too should do a good beer guide,but I will definitely try some Hoegaarden (sounds like a place out of a ganster rap song)but Belgians sure know how to brew dude :)

Definite family resemblence there MAB,although the toothless one is not quite as facially hirsute as the good lady folk of the MAB clan.
Cobra will be on the testing list as will the Polish beer (if it is Tyske from Aldi) I have never had Guinness and Ricicles but I did have Guinness and a black-eye at my cousin's wedding in Portumna.