Monday, June 15, 2009

HIPPO ON A MOTORCYCLE €4000


Hippo on a motorcycle the first in an exciting collection of avant garden sculptures by world famous poet and photographer , Alphonsus, Aloyuisus, TotalfeckinEEjit
.According to art critic Brian Suet these sculptures 'portray intimate details of the script of 'life' both as we know it in a super nova cognitive manner and as we percieve it (or not) with the subconscious
.They are (paradoxically) both an explanation and denial of mans ability and inability to express himself through the medium of dance. These teleological timepieces (that rust and decay and pass just as we humans do) are not just allegorical they are reality depicted in exactitude, no metaphor in this metal.(According to EEjit these incredible installations took many ,many minutes to make and almost an hour of thinking.) Mr Suet continues ' looking at EEjits work it's hard not to question the past, while querying the point of the future,positing ethnology ,biology,capitilism ,marxism,the planet itself and the unfathomabilty of it's inhabitants.Furthermore they give impetus to the swinging pendulum of the 'Is this art?' brigade and then stop them dead.They give an appropriation of the meaning of existential life that is both permanent and transient, latent yet so, so obvious, like the once ironically trendy kitsch ideal, we (through the artists visionary restraints) are held held hostage in a kitchen drawer. The simplicity of the piece is a red herring,even EEjit himself, the master of double-think and denial, claims the whole lot was just a load of shite that he found on a beach, that he lashed together under the influence of alcoholol.Well Mr EEjit is fooling no-one. The genius of the piece is realised through the emotional and physical distance between the viewer and the sculpture.At first glance it is an impersonal one, yet with familiarity the gap is narrowed to infinity and a new united perspective of duality is achieved.The Devil and angel within us, of change and chance, represent the inner model in response to the outer creation and we transcend barriers of apathy till ultimate involvement and empathy with the sculpture. Marvellous! '

49 comments:

Niamh B said...

Wow, are you in marketing? seriously?

Very nice, I'll take two of them,

Heather said...

This work is amazing - it should be shown in the most important galleries in the world and is worthy of the highest awards. I enjoyed reading the critique that came with it - that deserves an award also!! Keep beachcombing, you could go far.

Pure fiction said...

There's something dark and disturbing at the underbelly of this work - the menacing presence of the tiny plastic hippo and the slightly out of focus feel to the first photo suggest the artist was in the grips of an uncontrollable creative storm (or that he'd had a few too many beers.)
Re your moon widget - can the moon really be only 45 per cent of full, when a few days ago it was 71per cent and gibbous? Don't tell me it's just decorative?

Totalfeckineejit said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Totalfeckineejit said...

Yes, Mrs Niamh, I was in the market at the weekend and bought a €2 punnet of Wexford strawberries, delicious, and somewhat of a bargain methinks.I only have the one Hippo on a Motorcycle, would you like it gift wrappped? (an extra €150 plus VAT.)i can send it parcel post( €95 takes 3days )or get Jimmy the Butler to bring it down on the Honda 50 (€250 takes 3 hours , unless he stops off at Dooley's in which case we mightn't see him or the sculpture for 2 months)

Poetikat said...

I'm really exhausted from an airport run (wake-up call was 4:30 a.m.), but I had to see this with my own eyes. You're going for a Zen-Buddhist thing with a bit of (insert famous wood-carver--if there is one (and don't think I don't know where you'll go with that one!)). I am blown away. Your genius astounds me.

(Actually, I was never here. Tell no-one, because officially, I'm on holiday).

Yours in admiration,

Kat

Totalfeckineejit said...

Hey, Heather, beachcoming is fun and yes Mr suet should get some recognition for his wonderful critique.If I can't flog them, a gallery might be the next best option.I could go far-I went half a mile last week!

The Weaver of Grass said...

Worthy of inclusion in Tate Britain I would have said (or is there an Irish equivalent?)

Niamh B said...

Aww, wanted to have one in the front and back garden, to create a hidden resonance, a piquant harmonic of feeling and poetic sculpture that would permeate and elucidate the hidden patterns of aura inferred myopathy found in the rhythms of modern day pathos.
If there's only one of them, forget it.

Totalfeckineejit said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Totalfeckineejit said...

Zen and the art of motorcycle sculpture by Robbie M. Pisstwig,Poetikat,tired or not , you've hit the proverbial on the nut.Airport call at 4.30 are your passenger friends insane? I was just going to bed then.I hope they paid you lots of money or at least brought lovely gifts.Enjoy your holiday.I saw nothin.

Totalfeckineejit said...

Glad,PF, that your saw the dark side.As for the widget, I presume it to be accurate,but if it ever stops raining here and we get clear nights I'm going to check. It does seem that the moon is waning far quicker than it should.It could be that somehow the fine eco balance between the (waxing) man in the moon cheese production and the (waning) (gibbous) gibbons consuption has somehow got out of synch.I've quietly suspected for a while now that the gibbons have been over-harvesting,so I am delighted that you too suspect something is not quite right here. Watch this space (sic) OOh! I hate when people put Sic it makes me sic.If something is a funny obvious pun type thing then we can all see it, were not morons (well, I am ,but that's beside the point)so the sic is not needed.On the other paw if the pun is so obscure and hoity-toity-cleverer-than-thou intellectual that the sic IS needed then the author should get his head out from his own pretentious arse.

Totalfeckineejit said...

We have IMMA here, Weaver,a lofty place I've tried several times to get into without success - and that's only to look around.

Totalfeckineejit said...

Mrs Niamh,Wow,are you in marketing? seriously? I understand now(almoist) the need for two and I got Jimmy the Butler to work this out with pencil, paper and an abacus, that there is a 75,000,000,000 billion-6 million- 300-thousand-and-456-to-one chance of me finding the exact same items on the beach tommorow enabling me to create the exact same sculpture, so all is not yet lost.
Ps. How did the (d)reading go?

Niamh B said...

well you can't expect to be taken seriously as an artiste if you can't reproduce your work at the drop of a hat for commercial purposes... no pressure now.
Dreaded reading wasn't too bad at all - full report on my blog later hopefully, if i don't fall asleep before I manage to post it, thanks for asking :-)

Sarah said...

I have transcended the barriers of apathy enough to leave a comment.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
I wish there was a record my laughter button but all there is are letters. Thanks for the laugh!

Yoli said...

Take it straight to the Bristol museum and get that hack that is currently exhibiting out! Genious I tell you! LOL.

Rachel Fox said...

Brian Suet made me laugh. I'm very childish.
x

willow said...

Hey, Total, I've popped over from Kat's blog. Thanks for the huge giggle from your cycling hippo!

willow said...

Heh heh. I just noticed you're in Dublin. Me, too! Ohio, that is!!!

Raph G. Neckmann said...

Do you do commissions, TFE? I'd like to commission a piece around the 'appropriation of the meaning of existential life that is both permanent and transient' and featuring a giraffe.

I have no money, but in exchange for the sculpture we'd give you an month's artist's residency at the Gleeful & Greedy Restaurant in Neckelchester village, including board and food ,(no drink, sorry), art materials, and an exhibition. This is subject to finding a portal to transport you from Planet Earth to Camelopardalis.

Totalfeckineejit said...

Glad it went well Niamh, I'm off to the beach now with a torch.

Totalfeckineejit said...

hello sarah,thanks for the ha ha's, much appreciated and welcome to my humble ablog.Where are the Barriers of Apathy by the way- is it Greece?

Totalfeckineejit said...

Hello Yoli,welcome to my humble ablog and thanks for the comment.Who is exhibiting in Bristol museum,could you put in a word for me, like sausages ,or Albequerque? Thanks.

Totalfeckineejit said...

Hi ,Rachel,Brian Suet always makes me laugh, i think it's the voice ;)

Totalfeckineejit said...

Well, I'm Wishing you a warm welcome Willow,from Dublin Dublin, to Dublin Ohio, via outer space ,an incredible journey of almost 36 miles.Isn't technology wonderful? Thanks for dropping by :)

Totalfeckineejit said...

Do you know, Ralph, by strange coincidence I was planning a giraffesque sculpture that does just that.The residency sounds delightful,I'd love to go,don't worry about the portal,i think I found one on the Navan road the other day.It's a fantastic offer thank you for it and for dropping by.By the way I think I was in Camelopardis when I was working on Irelands top secret space programme in the 80's.I built a beautiful machine out of the corrugated iron roof of the haggard and a 1965 Massey Ferguson tractor.Unfortunately funding ran out and it's buried in a secret location up in the Pheonix Park.Thanks for dropping by.

John Hayes said...

One word: brilliant! A few more words: we love makeshift garden art-- it's our specialty! Mr Suet is hilarious! I love the red hippo.

Totalfeckineejit said...

Hey, John, I loved Eberle's sculpture garden and it kinda inspired me to have a go myself, glad you like the hippo and doing this stuff is FUN isn't it? I'm working on another garden one and I've just completed a table top one that I really like.See what you and Eberle have started?

Marja said...

Came over from Kat. What can I say. I don't have your words too express myself regarding this wonder piece, but I think it's eeeh a cute bike Well done

tony said...

Art Is ALIVE!

Dave King said...

I am amazed, stupified with wonder, agog with the numinous - and I wouldn't have missed your post for the world. Wonderful!

Totalfeckineejit said...

Hi Tony and welcome and ,yes, art is alive even when it's dead.

Totalfeckineejit said...

Thanks Marja and welcome,it is a cute bike but is it €4000 of cute? If so cheques and postal orders are fine and shipment can be arranged :)

Totalfeckineejit said...

Thanks, Dave, and numinous? I really like it, what an apposite word.Took me 3 dictionaries to discover what it meant(you are SO erudite)but it's a great word, I will steal it!

Mrsupole said...

Hi,I am coming here by way of Kat.

I am shamelessly promoting a project at my website for everyone to see.

Just click on my name and then I will also ask if you will join me to shamelessly join in and promote it too. The more who join, the more shamelessness for us all. This should be fun for everyone and we are doing something good.

God bless.

Liz said...

TFE, parcel me up a dozen of those guys - if you branch out beyond the hippo, let me know - I quite fancy a pig-in-a-poke on a motorcycle. There is a big Harley contingent here, between us, we'll be rolling in it!
(I think you've found your niche! (great stuff, TFE ; )))

Totalfeckineejit said...

Welcome , Mrs upole to my ever so humble ablog.I will check out your campaign and if I can help ,I will.:)

Totalfeckineejit said...

Hey,Liz, poet extraordinaire, i will swap you six original sculptures, for one copy of 'The Wrong Miracle' :)

Isabel said...

Here via Poetikat's and already counting my euros towards my bid on your masterpiece ;)
Will you consider layaway? I already have €2 ...but if I can pay in good hearted prose-induced laughs...your magnificent sculpture can consider itself on its way to my humble abode.
A pleasure of a visit! Thanks!

Totalfeckineejit said...

Hi Isabel;, welcome to me blog and thanks for dropping by.Laughter may be a great currency but they don't take it at Aldi (our local supermarket)However €2 is a good start,triple it and the masterpiece is yours.I like your icon by the way, the 3 birds on the barbed wire-cool:)

steviewren said...

Reminds me of art class critique....making sure to sell your piece so that the instructor totally buys into the notion that your pile of beach crap is really a visual metaphor of the duality of life.....or something like that.

The Lesser Weevil said...

My brain hurts ....

Totalfeckineejit said...

Steviewren, welcome to me auld blog,art class? Real art? How is it done? How do you sell it? The really bad stuff, so bad it has to be good? Tell me tell me tell me?Thanks fer dropping by :)

Totalfeckineejit said...

Mine too, Weevil, I think it's that really cold choc -ice I had for breakfast.

Dominic Rivron said...

My thoughts exactly, Mr Suet.
:)

I tried carving interesting sounding quotes and phrases on rocks and leaving them round our garden once. Eg, From Hugh MacDiarmid

the crow cannot quench the light
With its outstretched wings forever

but it was extremely labour intensive. It took hours, so I gave up.

ArtSparker said...

I think you have chopped up post-modernart criticism up and left its bleeding, twitching bits lying in the street. Robert Hughes would be proud.

The Hippo resembles Marlon Brando in his later years...as if The Wild Ones had been remade as a meditation on mortality.

Totalfeckineejit said...

Hey, Dominic, I really like your idea of carving words on the rocks.How many did you do before you gave up?I'm gonna have to do one for sure. Like that one about the crow.


Hello, ArtSparker,thanks,I like the cut of your gib! That is brilliant, I am naming the hippo Marlon, tout suite.

Dominic Rivron said...

I did the one I quoted and got half way through

a violet by a mossy stone half hidden from the eye

(Wordsworth) and gave up!